Girls, Be Strong
Corrie Vandyke
December 16, 2009
Filed under Opinion/Editorial
It’s hard to imagine someone you love breaking your heart in one of the cruelest ways – cheating. Unfortunately, according to www.cheatedbylife.com a recent poll shows that 60-70 percent of American relationships have faced the reality of a cheating partner. If those statistics are right, you will likely face this in one of your relationships if you haven’t already. I’m focusing this article specifically on cheating boyfriends, but that doesn’t mean that I am ignorant of the fact that girls are just as capable of cheating.
Maybe you found out that your boyfriend cheated on you by reading his texts or seeing his call history. Maybe a friend told you she knew something was up. Maybe he even told you himself. Girls have a pretty good instinct of noticing when something isn’t right. If you have suspicions that your boyfriend is cheating on you, then you could very well be right, but don’t go crazy on him. Unless you are completely sure that he is being unfaithful, don’t let him be aware of your suspicions, because you don’t want him to think that you don’t trust him. Trust is a huge factor in a relationship.
If you have proof that he cheated on you, then you should bring it up with him. He may or may not admit it at first. The best thing to do when a guy cheats on you is to break up with him. He will probably cheat on you again, even if he says he has changed. I really do believe that some guys can change, but since he hasn’t matured completely, it might be a few years before he truly changes for good.
The problem is that some girls are so blinded by love that even if their boyfriend cheats on them or abuses them, they will easily forget it and take him back, without seeing the big problem behind his actions. There are certainly different motives for cheating, and one is that he might be using you. This hurts, and it is really selfish of the guy to play with your heart like that. Junior Katie Gambrell said, “It makes me want to hate the person who I trusted with everything. At first you don’t want to believe it and try to think that it didn’t really happen, but you know in the back of your mind this really happened.”
Another reason is that you may be getting on his nerves and another girl has come along, and she is really relaxed, something that almost all guys desire. If you are always asking him questions and assuming where or what he has been doing, then it is going to make him want to be as far from you as possible.
I can’t say what Elin Woods is really like, but it could be that Tiger didn’t feel bad about cheating on her because she was becoming boring, in his eyes, and being cranky. I don’t support any of his recent actions, but girls have to realize that they could be pushing their men away without knowing it. If you think you’re doing this, try your best to keep a good attitude around him and think of fun things to do when you hang out. It’s important for girls to realize that part of the problem could lie with their selves.
There are lots of other reasons guys might cheat on their girlfriends, but guys need to take into consideration is that girls are fragile, and you guys have a big responsibility when you date them to protect their hearts. Whenever you date a girl, whether you are going to be with her the rest of your life or not, keep in mind that we aren’t just items or toys, we are human beings with feelings. If you are going to break up with a girl because she isn’t your type or it just isn’t working out, then do it quickly – dragging it out only makes it harder for the both of you. Let her know why you are breaking up with her and give her some closure. Even though she will hurt for some time, this is one of the least painful ways to end it.
Girls, if you find out your boyfriend was unfaithful to you, don’t cheat on him as well just to get him back. Take the high road, you will gain respect by that, and the next guy that comes along won’t be as worried about you cheating on him if he hears that you handled the situation with maturity. Cheating is low, you are better than that, so don’t do it. “I think cheating is a 9 on a 10 scale,” Junior James Gainous said. Believe me, he will get what he deserves before long, cheaters never prosper.
Take Tiger Woods and Mark Sanford for examples, they both had everything going for them – a beautiful wife, beautiful kids, a great job, money – but they still messed up. Both of them said some pretty mean things about their wives that leaked out, and even though they felt that way about their wives it gave them no right to do that to their family. “It was very low what he (Tiger) did, and I don’t blame his sponsor not sponsoring him anymore. I don’t see what’s stopping his wife from getting a divorce… it had to have humiliated her,” Gambrell said. Junior Dylan Slater said, “I think Tiger Woods is a loser for cheating, along with any other guy who cheats.”
Usually it makes anyone depressed for a while when they have been cheated on. The best way to get out of that depression is to keep going. Keep doing the things you have to do, and don’t let yourself just sit around and dwell over what happened. Get rid of the guy, and move on. If you decide you want to work things out with him, then you have to be ready to forgive him, and forget. Don’t bring it back up with him in mean and nasty ways. If you don’t truly forgive him for what he did, then your relationship will end in a lot of pain and heartache for the both of you.
Thank goodness that there are a lot of good, honest guys out there who truly want to put their woman first, you just have to take the time to find one if you haven’t already. Stop letting those unfaithful ones get in your way.
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Im a guy and i thought this was really good. i would never cheat on my girlfriend because thats stupid, all your doing is just hurting the people around you that you care about by cheating.
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